Lessons from 2015

With 2 days left until 2016, I’ve been thinking about what this year has brought me.

As with all people, I’ve had major ups and some equally major downs. The one thing I can say is that this year has been the best year that I can remember having in a long time.

I’ve been able to avoid drama for the most part and enjoying life without it.

I’ve been disappointed with my writers block and it’s something I’m still working on. It sucks that my writing was going to freaking well and then nothing-zip-zilch-nada. I haven’t given up though and next year will continue working toward getting my “mojo” back.

I’m learning to be more selfish. It’s not as bad as it sounds. I only mean that trying to make sure that other people are happy and sacrificing what I love, isn’t going to make me feel better about myself or improve my life.

Unhappiness lead to all kinds of physical and emotional issues that I no longer want to deal with. I used to be sick a lot, especially after my surgery. We all know what stress and unhappiness can do to us.

Physically, we begin to fall apart. We get sick, injured because our immune system is suppressed. Going through life pretending that everything is great when it isn’t takes a serious toll on us. I’ve seen many people (including myself) who get sick, sleep a lot, can’t sleep at all, feel lost, feel alone and for what. Because they are still searching for that perfect life.

I don’t want or need perfect. I think when we yearn for perfection, it’s because we’re empty inside. We hide who and what we are because that’s what “SOCIETY” says we have to be in order to be happy. Perfect job, perfect home, perfect kids, perfect life – yeah rarely does that happen.

When I made the choice to pursue what makes me happy (and a better person) things started to change. Instead of blaming everyone else for my woes, I’ve tried to move beyond it. There have been plenty of hiccups along the way but it gets a little easier to deal with them when they come along.

A couple of days ago, I lost my temper with the DH. The one thing I can’t stand and it usually set me off is when people bitch over little things. It drives me crazy and as I said it set me off.

Lucky for me my oldest son really knows me well. He was able to calm me down, telling me to chill that I was close to the edge and I indeed did calm down. I’ve missed that in my life. Someone who’s able to get me out of my bad head space. But it worked.

I’ve made my goals for the New Year, my big expectation is to do better than I did this year. Take care of myself both mentally and physically. Knowing I can be kind and compassionate without compromising my happiness.

I wish you all a Happy New Year,

Sierra

MYS

 

 

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