Thank You!

I’ve been a bad blogger. There has been a several stressers lately. Without going into detail, I’ll say family, friends, sickness and owning your own business has finally exploded.

It’s been going on for while and without thinking, I find that I’ve fallen into some bad habits. I thought I was feeling pretty damn good. I’d lost 30 pounds. I hadn’t cried in a long time. I was feeling a little too happy.

I want to say a sincere Thank-you for pointing it out to me.

I came home and took an inventory of my medication and realized that I haven’t taken it like I should. While not a conscious decision, it’s not a good thing if I miss them.

Shit builds up. The more you push it down the worse it ends up being. Because you find that you could explode and take your stress out on someone else.

I was proven right that  “time (doesn’t) makes you forget the bad and only remember the good.” No matter when you’re told that. Because when people aren’t happy in their life, they will remind you that the past, as they  remember it is your fault. Even if they were snowed by someone else’s LIES. And even if they themselves weren’t honest to anyone.

I’m grateful I was reminded of the things that don’t rule my life.  But, I’ve also come to realize that I’m not going to tell someone what they want isn’t important.

I also realize that I’ve been angry over the past few weeks. Yeah I know part is hormonal, but it’s mostly about stress.

The last thing I want is to be an angry person again nor do I want to cause anyone any pain. While their was some petty juvenile mud slung my way, I feel more compassion then anything else. I’d rather love then hate. I’d rather feel bad for what they may be going through.

Through all the B.S I still have been given a lot over the years. When your happy that your doing what you want, aren’t blaming the world ( and yes I’ve done this very thing and won’t go back again.) for the difficulties you put yourself in, and  take care of yourself, the past doesn’t have power over you anymore.

Sometimes there actually isn’t an ulterior motive. Sometimes it’s only a hello.

 

 

 

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